PRS: Pengaruh Rakan Sebaya

Bukan pembimbing rakan sebaya ya..It's kinda hard to raise your kids when you are a working mum. We tried our best to nurture good values like, salam org tua, say sorry, say thank you, don't shout, don't kick people, don't put your feet on people, talk nicely. But when you are a working mom, your kids spent 8hours with other people, be it your maid or at nursery and only 3hours with us. Kalau overtime balik lambat silap2 xsempat jumpe sbb dh tido as in my case coz Afeef budak sekolah tido on time 9.30pm.

Dulu Afeef budak yang sgt baik, sgt well-behaved coz we tried as much as we could to nurture all the good values. Tapi sejak dh pandai berkawan with the cousins and spent almost 8hrs x 5days = 40hours in their room, he now behaves if not totally, pretty much like them too. Sedih bile my Kakngah cakap, "Kaklong, aku tgk Afeef skarang dh mcm perangai F, semalam tibe2 die tendang Fwz..terkejut Fwz sbb dulu Afeef x macam tu..."

Sedih..sedihhh..bukan sedih kakngah ckp mcm tu, sbb she was just telling because she herself is worried too..tapi sedih bile kite cube didik anak perkara yang elok tp kerana rakan sekeliling berperangai the total opposite, he followed them instead.

Ini baru 2tahun, mcm nila rupenye perasaan parents about the friends that their kids chose. Ya Allah, semoga anak kami bijak memilih kawan yang baik, yang soleh, yang mengundang kepada perkara kebaikan amin ya rabbalamin.. 

Interview Fever - Part II

So today was my interview with the 'Susu cap junjung company'..To be honest, although this position shud be an easy-peasy one compared to the risk/safety position, I was very nervous unlike the previous, coz dis company is so popular of asking fundamental university exam type of questions, since I applied for a Cost Engineer post so I did some study on planning/costing..and guess what? I was almost right except dat i didn't anticipate them to ask questions like a PTD exam but oil&gas version!

The longest interview ever, jawab exam 10pages 45min and 15mins extra time was given. Interview session 1 1/2 hours. Total hours I spent there termasuk termenung tunggu dipanggil is 3 hours! Hubby who's having an interview at Arm**a TP** pn habis dulu although his interview session starts at 12pm.

BTW, mase tengah termenung tunggu dipanggil tibe2 ade one guy yg agak familiar entered the office and sambil lalu stared at me mcm kenal. Puas kufikir, I think he's my schoolmate named Am*dtakiy********. Tapi can't recall la muke die mase skolah macammane so xsure huhuhuhu!

Killer Question.. T.T

INTERVIEW FEVER

Alhamdulillah setinggi2 kesyukuran dipanjatkan kepada Allah yang Maha Kaya lagi Maha Berkuasa. After so many months of trying and waiting, Alhamdulillah finally, I get to be called for interviews, and Maha Kaya Allah swt, all interviews are of different post. Berkat mendengar cakap suami supaya bersabar at current company and gain as much experience as i could being a multitask engineer (i.e. engineer sampah as we always joked at), berkat mendengar ckp mama ayah supaya amik Biotech Engineering huhu, that's how I met my dearest hubby and get to be a multitask engineer..Sesungguhnya I've always believe in keberkatan dalam setiap perkara/keputusan kalau mendapat restu parents and bile dh kawin restu suami n parents. That's how I'm married to dearest abang. :)

Semalam interview with this one Bumiputra Oil&Gas Consultant, although mcm same je dgn my current company i.e. bumiputra juge, the difference is, this time it's a huge company with Petronas licence, therefore almost all projects are PCSB projects. The post was a Risk/Safety Engineer. The exhilarating part was, the post is more on Process safety, therefore my dream to come true. I've always wanted a job related to Process all along. And they're offering me a Lead Engineer post, hence I demanded better salary than what I expected coz I applied for engineer biase initially. But the down part is, I'm to be stationed at Kota Kinabalu for a year, plus a 1week visit to offshore every month. Berat, berat..so many things to contemplate..breastfeeding Amalia? Whom to take care of my kids? Where shall they stay, KL or KK? Away from Hubby? Another maid or just daycare? Tapi bile google most of them are not muslim daycare, as in none yg muslim that i found. Hubby said this is the best for my future. My Mama said just doa that Allah give the best for you and your family, thus if you don't get it, then maybe it's for the best. OK, I'll make Solat Istikharah and pray to Allah for the best for us, Amin ya rabbalalamin...

This 1st March, another interview with a Dutch Oil&Gas Consultant, SBM and this time it is for a Planning/Cost Engineer post. I hope I'll do well coz the company has a good track record in terms of employee's benefit and project-wise. 

Tomorrow ade walk-in interview with this huge oil & gas consultant, worleyparsons. Ingat saje2 nk try at least I can get soalan bocor for my next interview at sbm, coz the post that I'm going for is a Project Control Engineer which also involve doing costing and planning as well. 

Ya Allah, permudahkanlah segalanya untukku demi masa depan anak-anakku...Amin ya Rabbal Alamin..

p/s: special note to my kids, esok dh besar jgn degil2..dengar cakap mama n babah, insyaAllah dipermudahkan segala urusan oleh-Nya..amin..

REZEKI

When we talk about REZEKI it always means the source of money to some of us, including me. And by money, rezeki therefore means career, well, at least to me.

I've been working in the same company since I 1st graduated, that makes it nearly 5 stagnant years. I think for some concrete reasons, finally it's time for me to move on. 1stly, I'm feeling bored already, not because of doing the same thing for 5 years, not. My company is a small consultant, therefore you get surprise tasks all the time, Aishah, I want you to do analysis on structural design..Aishah, you are now the project engineer of this job, so start monitoring the progress of all discipline from now..Aishah, I want you to procure some steels and timber for this project, please do the MTO 1st and start sending Purchase Order...Aishah, there's a problem with the Fresh Water System in this project, please study and find out the problem...Aishah, we're now eyeing for Wellhead Platforms, please do some study as I want you to become the Process Engineer for these projects..it's always a new thing, new experience, every day.

You see? My CV is kinda colourful, with too many experiences in too various specialization, I can become a Process Engineer, a Safety Engineer, a Project Engineer, a Structural Engineer and etc etc. I always complained as I always wanted a focus and more specialized job so I can be an expert in that 1 particular field. But Abang always assured me that this will be good for my CV, CV you cantik as he always said. But sejak mengandung kan Amalia, I think my patience has reached the limit, enough already of doing things without guidance (we have no senior engineers at the office, so you are on your own all the time), enough of being a Multitask Engineer aka an ES (Engineer Sampah) as we always joked at the office.

Furthermore, for the 1st time in my 5 years working there, our pay due for 2 months, 2 CONSECUTIVE MONTHS! It's like a sign to me, for my whole 2 months confinement period, we didn't get our salary! Nasib baik tgh dlm pantang, so I feel nothing but relax, no need in paying parkings n lunches except for online shopping hehehe! So I've started sending out CV (in jobstreet mostly) after 1month confinement i.e. luka dh baik skit and dh bole duduk on chair lama in front of laptop. To my disappointment, almost every job I applied on jobstreet get viewed by the employer for more than once, 1 job even viewed my CV for 10 times! But at last, the status was unsuccessful, I get a lot of under considerations and kept for reference too but later the status changed to unsuccessful. More colleagues of mine are resigning while I'm in my confinement period and get a better offer at multinational companies while my effort remain fruitless. It was a totally devastating experience for me. I felt useless and demoralized at a point.

Then one day, I burst into tears, confiding to my dearest hubby, why orang lain murah rezeki, senang sangat dpt keje, there's even 1 newbie at my office who got a job that I applied too and he always seek for my advice at the office in doing analysis but he got the job while I was not even called for an interview. I started to think that I'm cursed and maybe hidup I x diberkati Allah and start to find what's wrong about me that make me an unlucky person.

As expected, as always, Abang just laughed while my tears are streaming down my cheeks. Abang said, Tak baik cakap macam tu, you ni x bersyukur. You ingat rezeki tu datang in 1 form je ke? Rezeki x semestinya your career only. Bersyukurla at least you already have a good job, bayangkan org lain yang xde keje langsung..tengok org yg lebih malang, org yg minta sedekah...jgn kita tgk org yg lebih bernasib baik...

And as usual, I always have points to refute back, Ala what's d point of having a good job if you didn't even got paid for it for 2 months? (I think i shud become a lawyer instead..maybe i've chose d wrong path anyway)

However deep in my heart, I start to think rationally, betul la..I memang x bersyukur, rezeki Allah beri pada makhlukNya comes in various forms, Allah Maha Kaya..memang I susah apply keje, tapi I terlupe sekejap pada nikmat dan rezeki yang tak terhingga yang dikurniakan padaku, sebuah keluarga yang bahagia and sepasang cahayamata yang comel sihat dan sempurna yang melengkapi hidup kami suami isteri..cukup hebat rezeki yang dikurniakan, cukup membahagiakan..tp sebab kecil macam ni, aku terlupa akan nikmat yang telah dikurniakanNya..mungkin ni ujian for me, untuk menguji sejauh mana kesyukuran I pada Allah swt, sejauh mana I tabah dan sabar..ya Allah berdosanya aku kerana tidak bersyukur dgn rezeki yang kau kurniakan, astaghfirullahaladziim...ya Allah ya Tuhanku, ampunkanlah dosa hambaMu ini dan jauhilah aku dan keluargaku dari sifat kufur..amin ya rabbal 'alamin..

I will never trade my beautiful family with anything in this world..

Ramadan 1431H

Dulu before I was married, frankly speaking, Ramadan doesn't bring much meaning to me. To me, Ramadan means, I have to fast for a month, pergi solat Tarawikh tiap2 malam, kadang2 rasa letih x pegi pun xde perasaan rugi. Bile balik tarawikh, lepak makan morikh (i.e. sakibaki makanan berbuka yg masih banyak lagi) or sometimes kalau penat sgt terus tertido. I looked forward more to Syawal and rase x sabar nak end Ramadan sbb nk raye, makan kuih raya n minum air gas sambil lepak2 depan tv tgk program Raya. Kurang penghayatan, astaghfirullahalaziim..

Eversince I was married to Abang & his family, my Ramadan definition has totally change, Alhamdulillah to a much better definition. Everytime nak Ramadan, rase excited satu macam. Xsabar nk Tarawikh, xsabar nk pegi Tadarus after Tarawikh kt rumah BK ('rumah ibu' family Abang) and bile dah nk abis sebulan Ramadan rase rugi sgt, and rase mcm menyesal sbb xcukup memanfaatkan sebulan Ramadan. Sejak kahwin, Raya pun seronok jugak sbb byk berjalan Raya, family abang extremely besar. Abah asal Kg Baru, adik beradik 10 org, Mak pulak asal Petaling, adik-beradik 6 org, belum campur tok nenek sedara Abang lagi. Ramai betul. Satu hari berjalan sampai 5 buah rumah, itu biase..Raya seminggu hari2 berjalan Raya, belum kira yg datang rumah, mmg seronok sbb jalan beraya beramai2 rombongan smpi 5-6 bijik kereta, cukup meriah. Tapi tetap rase Ramadan lebih bermakna.

Tahun lepas I didn't have the chance to Tarawikh at the Masjid sbb Afeef mase tu baru 4-5 months old and fully on breastfeeding. So solat tarawikh di rumah aje, kurang semangat bile solat sendiri berbanding jemaah di Masjid. Tadarus pun kadang2 je dpt pergi sbb selalu Abang balik Tarawikh, I'm already fast asleep keletihan sbb menyusu badan.

Tahun ni, walaupun masih rase x cukup memanfaatkan sebulan Ramadhan, tapi rase paling happy n puas setakat ni, 1stly sbb dpt solat Tarawikh di Masjid bergilir2 dengan Bibik, since Afeef dh fully on FM and Afeef dh besar n pandai main2 dgn cousins and bawak diri. Terpakse bergilir sbb Bibik pn nk solat di Masjid juga. And 2ndly, I get to Tadarus in the same group as Abang*. Rase semangatnye satu macam, and rase bahagia :)

Furthermore, Abang punya ilmu dalam bacaan Al-Quran jauh lebih dalam dari orang lain dalam family especially me, so Abang banyak betulkan my bacaan sepanjang tadarus dari segi panjang harakat and tajwid. Terasa banyak sangat dapat belajar dr Tadarus tahun ni, thank you sayang..I love you soooo very much~

Afeef pn dah besar and bijak, bila pergi Tadarus rumah BK, we always angkat him while sleeping, awal2 selalu terjaga bile diangkat, and bile tengok org ramai dalam bulatan masing2 pegang Al-Quran, die pun sibuk nk pegang so I gave him a Yassin or sometimes pinjam buku Iqra' his Uncle Aqil. Nanti die pun sibuk membaca siap berlagu2 tiru intonation org2 mengaji and tarik2 nafas dalam2 after every stop, bijak betul meniru org tua..hehe. And then masuk 2nd week die dah macam immune diangkat2 naik turun kereta pergi tadarus, so he stayed asleep sampai la kami abis Tadarus and balik rumah Taman semula.

*Footnote: Before this we Tadarus in different group lelaki and perempuan separately and bahagi2kan juz sbb nk abis cepat n dapat khatam 2-3 kali, tp tahun ni sbb Abang cakap kalau buat macam tu xbole khatam sbb xdikire tadarus bersama, maka kami buat only 1 group tadarus and dapat khatam only once.

My Blog: New Image. New Episode.

I've been meaning to dedicate this blog as a field for me to pour out my personal feelings and not for anybody to see except for my beloved other half, i.e wonderful husband. Furthermore, when I 1st started blogging, none of my friend (well at least none that i know of) blogs. So I xde geng blogging where we can do some blog-hopping activity. Suddenly at one period, like a gigantic wave from tsunami, all my close friends in Uni and schoolmates started to blog and announced their blog to the world, and in spite of that, I remained mine a secret. Probably I was used to having it that way, not for public to see that is. Plus, mine was unlike others with fancy templates and widgets and all, while mine was maintained the classic version with no modification at all. So typical of me yg xsuke kereta modified or jailbroken iPhone semata2 rase macam dah hilang the originality (haha..hubby always laugh at me for being at lost for this silly hard-headed stand).

Mase me and my adik2 were babies, my Mama used to write down all our milestones diligently so when we were older and dah pandai membaca, we always read the diary again and again sampai tercerai pages dia and gelak2kan ourselves and each other for being so cute and funny mase baby (Thank you Mama for being so thoughtful and a wonderful mom to us, we love you so very mucchh). So when Afeef our little handsome prince arrived in this world, I started to blog only on his milestone. So I changed my permission setting from only author can see to selected readers can see my blog and selected Hubby and my Kakngah who was in Korea doing her Master back then to keep them aware and updated on Afeef's milestone. But somehow they can't open my blogpage due to some unknown problem. So I was thinking to myself, maybe it's time for me to make this blog of mine public. Not that public, i.e no announcement to be made or I shan't publish the link in FB whatsoever. Simple enough, anyone can google and learn its existence, more specifically my family and friends.

Speaking of having an old-fashioned blog template, I started to ask 1 of my active blogging bosom, Zety on how to customize our blog template and she taught me how. I tried a few times, but the result was hideous, not to mention gonjeng with all the widgets tunggang terbalik and lari dari alignment. So I gave up and stick to the best that I could get at the moment which is frankly still not appealing to me. Until  one day today, I came across a nice blog with a nice template and I looked at every corner of the blog for cues of the origin of the gorgeous template and found this link. There were tons of gorgeous design for you to choose. I was being quite greedy at the moment and rase mcm nak try all and change every hour haha. But found this new template of mine, and I fell in love with my own blog for the 1st time after I changed to this new template! It is soo me, just look at the colours and the vibe it brings, it's my favourite combination of bright and vibrant shades of blues and greens! Terus bersemangat to realize my intention to make this blog of mine semi-public and hilang rase segan nak open it to everyone I care. Its as though orang yang banyak jerawat and obese segan nk jumpe orang n xnk keluar rumah langsung and after an extreme make-over at New York Skincare and Marie France Bodyline terus xsabar nak pergi KLCC kindathing hihihi!

If you click back at the archive to the 1st post of my blog, I named it as lilyiswhite simply because I pray for my life to be as pleasant, as simple and as blissful as lilies. And i thought it was a nice name for my blog to be until one day a pleasant and sweet girl came to work at my company and I became a good friend to the sweet girl (girl ye, tp dh ade anak sorang hihi xpela ibu muda so I shall address her as a girl), and as sweet and as pleasant as her persona, she was named by her parents, Lily. And eversince, every time I updated my blog, I felt like I'm hacking updating her blog instead of my own. It feels like plagiarism at times too, like I'm taking something of hers or at least a part of her haha tetibe je pulak rase macam tu  mcm xde kene mengena pun but it's true! Anyways, sempena mendapat semangat baru after succeeded in changing my  blog template with flying colours, I'm changing the name of my blog to worldofahza.blogspot.com since now my blog has changed from a place for me to pour out just my happiness i.e. me and the love of my love i.e hubby dearie to a place for me to mostly update my kids, the ahza siblings' milestone and of course on yours truly and hubby and families too.. :)

So family and friends who manage to come across my blog, happy reading..and to cinta hati mama and babah i.e. our lovely kids, happy reading and laughing at your cuteness mase baby..Mama and Babah loves you very2 much! xoxoxo

p/s: to my kids, mama has another blog for you to read which Mama updated promptly from my iPhone on your fast-paced development whenever I see new skill/development that you have learnt. So enjoy reading my dearests~

2nd 25th Birthday Celebration

This 2nd time i celebrated my birthday with my wonderful fiance.. :p was so gentleman of him to ask my dad's permission first, early in the morning (err..not that early..hee..) The venue was supposed to be a surprise for me..he did surprise me with flying colors, heeee..thought he wanted to bring me to a mamak restaurant or paling2 grand pun cozy corner ke..(xkisah la kn, as long as i can berbuka with him sambil tgk muke kekanda ku yg gorgeous itu weee..) but he drove me straight to Plaza Ampang basement parking lot..tup2 ehhh...berbuke at Crown Princess ke yang?? wiwiwiwiiiiii... :D

And it was truly sumptuous..the food was heavenly delicious and i can't stop eating sampai perut dah mcm mengandung 3 bulan...tegang tu..mcm pakai botox kat perut pun ade..erkk..and the big news is, i had my first dim sum here! meroyan kejap bile nampak ade dim sum yg pelbagai jenis...guess the chinese guy at the dim sum stall had already recognized me (bored seeing my face at his stall perhaps?? hihih..) ye la...asik dtg stall die jer....actually, there's a history about dim sum and me...and the story goes like this (kasik screen tv tu blurry skit plus gamba ade sepia effect tetiber):

"i spent my whole childhood in Pasir Gudang where we can get Indonesia and Singapore channels on our TV super clearly. Me and my kak ngah would switch to Singapore's SBC 5 everyday, religiously, before going to Sekolah Agama in the evening to watch mandarin dramas. Hitting me like a commercial ad, dim sum always appears in every drama and without warning, i would drool each time i saw them..mane taknyer, kecomelan bentuknyer yang pelbagai rupe yg unik dan texturenyer yg kilat2 basah itu sungguh meliurkan lagi menggugat jiwa kanak2 ku ketika itu...aduhhh sampai skarang pun sbnrnyer...heee"

Imagine i have been longing to taste a dim sum for nearly 20 years...however, comparing myself to the unfortunate, alhamdulillah, i am very lucky to at least have the chance..bulan Ramadhan ni kene insaf lebih skit..must always remember the unfortunate and help them by giving sadaqah more often..always remember, no matter how wealthy we are, how easy our life is...all these rezeki comes from the Almighty..and He can take it back from us anytime..so folks, let us always be humble and kind to those in need...seruan utk semua dan juge diri sendiri...


And makan jangan membazir..beli makanan byk2 kt bazaar, last2 basi jer..sbb byk sgt, x abis...speaking of membazir, just now, while i was choosing desserts before berbuka (this has actually been my habit since i was little, eating the desserts first instead of appetizers before the main course coz for me, appetizers should be sweet things like desserts and i'm such a sweet tooth, kaloh ore kelate, as validated by kelantaneses i.e. ming and biebozz) anyway, back to my story, a mother and her little girl was choosing desserts as well just beside me..overhearing the mother nagging the daughter..."jgn amik byk2, amik skit2 jer just utk rase..nnt x abis berdosa jer.." that line makes me smile coz it reminded me soo much of my mother and me when i was as little as the girl..she, just like the lady, always reminded us not to take too much food on our plate during buffet coz she knows pretty well, we are not going to finish it up and will end up by the waiters taking our still full plates away. Except my mom's favorite line ade tambahan kt blakang skit.."finish up your food..kesian kat org somalia...xmakan berhari2..kite yg dpt makan ni membazir2 pulak...baik beri pd org somalia food yg membazir tu..." i luv u ma, for teaching us to be a good khalifah on this earth..xoxoxo :) serba sebanyak, the pics of us that we took just now...

on our way to Crown Princess, in my kakngah's Bambi.

Wedding Bells

Received a phone call from an ol' friend...asking how have i been doing...after many denials by me and exhortations, of course by him, so i updated him on my most recent episode.. (^_^) and in return he updated me on a very big but anticipated news..someone is getting married! am sooooooo happy for them...they are made for each other pretty well indeed...may all goes well for both of them...and may i'll be invited too as i've been looking forward to this so special event for quite sometime..teheeheee!!

Speaking of wedding bells, i smell roses everywhere as love is in the air of 2007 and the forthcoming 2008 insya-Allah..everybody is busy preparing for engagement and getting married...speaking of my company i'm working in itself, there'll be 7 weddings to look forward next year including mine..may Allah swt bless us all, Aminn...

p/s: my boss will sure be burning his pocket for all 7 of his employees' honeymoon wedding gift to Bali next year...wat rombongan cik kiah naik tongkang je la gi Bali tu nmpknye...uhuk2..

Kenape sayer suke rumah sayer?

Sayer suke rumah sayer sebab ade pemandangan senja yg sgt cantik.....kenape awk tanye sayer soalan mcm ni?

Lily is White

My first entry! Yay me! Finally a blog, of my own..been longing to starting one, but lazy me, conveniently always equipped with excuses..so, why lily is white? i dunno, it has just popped out when this bloggy prompted me on the name of my blog..simply perhaps, i was thinking of lilies at that moment..and lilies are always pleasant in white..ok, pink is fine..but white is the best...white lilies..pleasant, indeed...and blissful....
On a more philosophical note, that is how I picture my life to be, as pleasant and blissful as white lilies..